Let me tell you about College Orientation:

I have the feeling that if you take away how I arrived in this place; ‘Trumped’ via Portal, or is that portaled via ‘Trump’? Delete the realization that I am now on a totally different planet, erm, ‘Shadow’. Strip away other fantastical things like being brought together with a bunch of strangers that are revealed to be distant relations. That we are all part of some magical monarchy. Forget about that for a moment and try to normalize things in a way that I can accept and process.

Let’s say that I was picked up by an airport shuttle and whisked away: To where? This isn’t a trade show in L.A.: That was a ruse. There are some definite cult-like qualities to the situation. I don’t feel like I’ve been drugged or coerced in any way. I could ask to go home, but I’m so intrigued by the prospects presented. It’s the fantastical things that are making me want to stay.

I need to think of this as College. Ms. Chan has brought us together and has just laid out our syllabus. The thing is, as inscrutable as I find Ms. Chan, I feel like she’s new to her position of professor and advisor and a little put out by the task of dealing with a crowd of neophytes. It’s as though this is an unpleasant chore that she has been assigned.

With these thoughts crowding my head which is already swimming with information overload, I follow Alarna out of the Library, across the hall and into an empty dining room. 

I take my armload of boots, beer and half eaten pastries and dump them on a table; feel a sudden pang of embarrassment and move my boots to the floor. I flick my wrist and notice that it’s a hair past four ayem local time which is only about six pee-em in my mind.

I turn and face my younger schoolmate Alarna and Ms. Chan who gets directly to business, "This shouldn't take long." as she then holds out her hands, “Alarna, please take my left hand, Catlin my right."

I fumble a bit awkwardly as I first reach out with my right hand to hers as though we are going to shake. Realize that we are joining hands to form a circle and switch to giving Ms. Chan my left and offering my right to Alarna, but a glance from Ms. Chan shows that we are not forming a circle but a line, so I withdraw my right hand.

The three of us are now connected and I feel a momentary sensation of vertigo wash through my mind. When I feel steady again I perceive that we are now in a version of the library that we had just left. Ms. Chan is standing in the middle of the room and just beyond her is Alarna. Alarna appears to be behind a two-way mirror. It’s like being in a cone of silence.

Ms. Chan’s voice comes into my mind, "Much faster than verbal communication and necessary. Since neither of you can actually shield any of your thoughts, I'm doing it for you, so whilst both of you can hear and talk to me, neither of you can hear or speak to the other.”

“Both of you have discovered Trump, although the manner in which you use Trump power is slightly different. Alarna's is the much more traditional picture form, it being both faster and more portable.”

“Both of you have learnt to tap trump sources, although probably not particularly strong ones, draw the energy, like drawing water from a well, and fix it into drawings or objects.”

“Now there is a scale of power in Trump, the best analogy for which is Candlepower, or Candela. So in both your cases you've probably found weak sources, a couple of thousand Candela in strength at the most, and you've applied them to a few Trumps, I would guess in the mid to high hundreds in Alana's case, and somewhere around the two thousand mark in yours’ Catlin. As a result you both unconsciously learnt to shield against low level trump sources.”

“The problem is that just a single one of the cards I carry-about routinely comes in at around 150 thousand candela, whilst the whole pack amounts to about 5 million. Then we scale things up again, my sword for instance would come in at about the fifty million mark, about on par with my own signature. And that's just me and a couple of things. You'll find the whole mansion is awash with Trump sources, and you're going to rapidly have to learn how to shield against them all, and that's only in a quiescent state. If you actually want to attempt to tap a trump source to produce a trump then you're going to have to up your game considerably, but that's a lesson and conversation for another time. Even with the lesson I've prepared"

A thin booklet about eight by five appears in front of Alarna and myself.

"you're still going to have it rough for the next week or so, and I'm afraid the first 24 hours are going to be the worst."

 I get the sense that Ms. Chan has finished her ‘speech’ so I gesture to Alarna that she may ‘speak’ first so that we don’t ‘talk’ over each other, as I say "Thank You Cordelia, Please, let Alana go first..."

I smile sheepishly and I take the booklet in my free hand.

I pause until they're done conversing then ‘say’ to Ms. Chan, "So, we call Portals ‘Trump’ here?”

"There is more to Trump than just creating Portals, since it allows communication to people depicted, and more besides. It is universally referred to as Trump to distinguish it from Magic, and other primary powers.”

“Okay… Are there any places here in Carnelian that are ‘quieter’ than others?”

“As to quiet places; the further you are away from the Mansion, with the exclusion of the vicinity of the Mizzurian main office, will be quiet. But that won't help you, since anytime you encounter anyone with a Trump Deck or Trump Artefact you'll experience the same issue.”

“Would it help if Alarna and I stick together, or keep our distance so we can help each other or make things worse for each other?”

“Other than if you wish to explore and learn the other's style the two of you working together will have no tangible benefit, other than potentially moral support.”

“Is all this extra radio interference from ‘Trump’ power going to make it more difficult to deal with the Pattern? I've got a million more questions, but I guess that's what the book is for..."

“Yes, not being able to shield against extant Trump sources will make walking the Pattern more complicated, at least until you're through the first veil, then it'll be drowned out in all the other noise. And the lesson is simply the basics of how to shield yourself from Trump Sources. To actually do so you'll have to put effort into applying those techniques. The more you practice, not that you have much choice around the mansion, the easier it will get. almost everything else in relation to furthering your abilities and covering a few basic but significant gaps in your understanding will have to wait until after the Expo. And one of those gaps requires you to be able to manifest a Pattern Image, which requires walking the Pattern in the first instance."

"Thank You. Are you going to drop the block cold turkey or in phases? I'd like to be able to brace myself, and I'm sure Alarna would appreciate that too."

"Cold turkey I'm afraid. It's an all or nothing block. I may be able to construct one that would withstand the influence of the Pattern but I couldn't say with any surety that it would work, and you're going to have to deal with it at some point, so possibly the sooner the better. You've probably got the best part of 4 hours before it breaks down."

"Well, what doesn't kill me makes me stronger. Right? I did a lot of the talking in the meeting, I'd like to go back and hear what the others have to say before my time runs out. And, Thank You for rescuing me from my mundane existence. I Love my family and friends, but life in general is starting to get stale.” I quip, “Remember these brave words in a couple of days when I come back to you whimpering.... ‘Into the Breach!’” as I take a stance like I’m ready to charge. This breaks my contact with Ms. Chan and I find myself and Alarna  are suddenly back in the dining room.

The whole conversation was done in a couple of short minutes and Ms. Chan gathers up her bowl of profiteroles and coffee and heads back out into the corridor.

"Good Night, or should I say... have a Good Morning Cordelia."

I offer my arm to Alarna, "I'd like to talk to you alone sometime soon, but in the meantime would you like to rejoin our other cousins?"

Alarna declines my arm as she turns towards the door saying, "Yes.. Ms. Chan said something about you having a different than traditional form of Trump. I'd be interested in knowing more. I also need to ask here about something else at some point. As to everything else she said, it's all a bit fantastic isn't it."

As we cross the hallway I see Ms. Chan heading away towards the stairs.

"Hard to say what's not traditional without knowing what the traditional way is. I hope our little textbooks will explain that. And see what sort of portals you make. Strange calling them ‘Trumps’. I call mine Trinkets and Minis. Trinkets for places or things and Minis of people. Models and figurines. Like I showed the rest of the class earlier. Speaking of class, let's get back in the library and see what the rest of the class is up to. Then, I expect to be cowering under my bed for a while when the block comes down in a couple of hours."

We quietly returned to the library only a couple of short minutes after hastily following Ms. Chan out for a brief tête-à-tête.

I got a fresh Lager/Rye and returned to my seat to listen to his new extended family while hungrily eating pastries and watching my new cousins.

Jason is speaking to the room, "I too, am wary that there will be a cost to the current situation..i also believe that it is worth risking, at least for me. To take the short step from "Freak" to "Gifted", if that is what it is; using portals... access to Higher Technology.... plus whatever else this does for us!"

Cormac nods to me, "So....has your opinion of this affair changed any?"

My emotion has been building. A  tear or two rolled down my cheeks. "I'm very overwhelmed at the moment but I'm determined to ride out the next couple of weeks and then go from there. So, no, I guess not. I feel like this is a huge opportunity for me. On multiple levels including getting to know my new found family."

Cormac raises a drink to me, "Well, all blessings to you then." He slams the drink back, "So. Anyone have anything substantive we want to talk about then, since we at least know where we stand with each other?"

Akio says to the room, "I'm not going to a stuffed dummy at a kids' cotillion, much less two balls. And I dress anyway I want, Ms. Cordelia. Iggy Pop or myself, say?”

I’m not sure what Akio means but I refer to his mentioning Iggy Pop when I ask him, "You've got a lust for life, Akio?" Things got lost in the translation and he doesn’t reply.

Fatima comes out of her shell and launches into, "I can't help but think of myself. I accept that I came here of my own volition, although mostly from a morbid sort of curiosity. But being presented with a completely different venue, or at least an obfuscated one, from what was suggested... I... I suppose just saying outright ‘You're special and can exist beyond this world. Let me show you your missing parent’ would be laughable at the least. I still feel she's hiding something, and the only reason I can think of 'why' is that it benefits her somehow to not tell us the answer. And she's not really tempting us with power, is she? It's a simple plea for help. ‘Claim this birthright.’ It's just... odd. Like. How many aunts and uncles remain that they really can't just do this repair themselves? Hasn't this kingdom existed for a long time? Don't all kingdoms fall? If the economies of, what twelve? other nations depend on one, then maybe it should fall, as that doesn't sound like a stable sort of economy. Maybe I'm just saying all this out loud to convince myself. I still don't understand what you all mean by 'shadow'. I think I'm ultimately worried about dying while walking this 'pattern'. I don't want to die!"

Cathal softly says to Fatima in a lilting Irish brogue, "You worry about dying, walking the Pattern. At least that would be a quick end. From my mothers memory, not all those who experience the Logrus share such a quick fate. Those that do not succeed are left as twisted shells, destined to die a slow death over decades if they are not put out of their misery by their families. And control of the Logrus is in the hands of one Lord, and has been for thousands of years. If you're not from the right family you do not get to merge with it at all, and that's after decades of study."

Fatima’s eyes glisten at this point, filling with tears. Her voice trembles slightly. "I made plans for myself. Can I really set aside the familiar for, forgive me, complete strangers? I was going to travel, maybe seek out my father, make a little money to move somewhere nice and absorb the culture. Will our homes be destroyed if this pattern isn't repaired? Or will it be as it sounds from Ms. Chan. Cousin Cordellia. It's just the failure of, uh, Amber? and the 12 kingdoms it supports? I feel such great conflict. I don't like to see people suffer or die, but even with all your help, how can we affect the will of destiny? Is Amber destined to fall? Or are we destined to be its saviors?"

The petite Japanese girl, Natsuki, moves to Akio’s side and softly says something to him in Japanese to which he replies in Japanese

Thinking to myself that everyone in this room is from different worlds but we all appear to be human and have shared similar circumstances. The relatively recent history of the multiverse that Ms. Chan has recounted, causing me to think aloud, "None of you appear the least bit freakish to me… We have all survived catastrophic natural disasters that by all reckoning happened at the time of this ‘Rodeo’ War?... All of us from different worlds but experiencing similar circumstances. But... Demons?! There were reports of Aliens attacking but no evidence has been found except for the stories of a few handfuls of survivors with PTSD.”

I pause a moment and then ask, “And, why would anyone subject themselves to Patterns and Logrus' unless the risk is worth it? I jumped into this with both feet, but this last part... Just to prove we're family... "

In his brogue accent Cathal replies, "Catlin, since the Logrus has nothing to do with Pattern, and those of the Courts vie for the privilege of merging with it, then it has nothing to do with Family and everything to do with the Power it offers. For me walking the Pattern doesn't prove I'm family to anyone other than Ms Chan and any other of our relatives that are still alive. What walking the Pattern does is enable me to traverse Shadow, at least as I understand it, and therefore to try and find my mother if she is still alive."

Cormac, "I'm not convinced of her claims of our shared heritage. But it's incidental if true. Family isn’t a fluke of blood. If it's so...." He shrugs. "I've not been given any reason to be motivated for a new secret family. And I was shown I wasn't alone by showing me similar people from other universes."

There’s the mystery of my Father’s disappearance and seeming abandonment of my Mother and I. "My Father disappeared and was presumed dead when I was just an infant. I've never had cause to miss him in my life. Maybe it would be nice to know more about him." I shrug. "I've been very lucky to have my Mom, Step-Dad and Step-Sisters… I don't have any reason or desire to wander through Shadows. However, my passion in life is to build and repair things. So, if one of these Patterns is broken... The opportunity to tinker with the machinery that runs the multiverse is tempting. The real bonus for me, here, is to learn more about Portals. What Cordelia calls ‘Trump’. And.... If any of that can be useful to the rest of you, I'll happily share what I can. It's nice to think that all of you are part of my extended family."

Fatima speculates, "Maybe walking the ‘pattern’ will clear up all our questions? And if our lives are ephemeral as Cordellia makes it seem, then our deaths mean nothing in the Grand Scheme. I might be an invisible speck on an invisible speck, but at least my speck means something to me. I'm not as strong in my faith as Mother. Maybe I haven't seen everything she has. Maybe what I believe is a façade to the full truth. Do any of you think the full truth will be found in The Pattern?" Her eyes harden, a certain sharpness has appeared that wasn't apparent before. She looks almost fierce as she continues, "Everyone is destined for something. Cordellia is offering a door that wasn't previously in our purviews. If we do this, we do this separately, but with the same intent. To expand beyond our worlds. To become something greater than before. I have a greater chance to find my father and travel as I had wished. If I can travel freely, I can visit Mother as I please." She softens, sighing, almost deflating, "But how do we prepare for this 'walk'? I've never run a marathon. It sounds exhausting, and she said if we stop to think or rest we will die. What preparations can we make except to die?"

Catlin "Fatima, have you ever done something dangerous on purpose? For the thrill? Sometimes doing something you know could hurt or kill you can be exhilarating. Sometimes being on the edge of death can make you feel more alive!"

Fatima replies, "Jo... that sounds highly irresponsible. Do you have extra lives stored away somewhere? I don't. I've kept my feet dry this long."

I grin at finally being addressed as Jo! "I think I threw all caution to the wind when I stepped through Cousin Cordelia's portal."

Cormac drolly, "I almost died once....I don't recommend that as a preparation. " With a smirk on his face he concludes, "Well this is at least relatively pleasant at least.”

Edward addresses Cathal… "You are the only person to mention the Courts... What are those? " He asks "And what is a Logrus?"

Cathal turns to Edward, " A palace? A city? I'm not exactly sure, just that my mother was originally from there.

The Logrus, well it's, an entity of sorts, difficult to describe, a sort of counterpart to the Pattern. I get the impression that it's somehow sentient but not in any way we'd comprehend. You merge with it somehow, and it leaves an imprint. Then somehow you make the imprint real and use it to cross shadow. My mother was very vague on a lot of this. But her feelings were very clear, it was evil, and manipulative, and I should stay away from it. But then again I very much doubt from everything else she said I'd ever get anywhere near it so the whole thing is a bit of a non-issue anyway. That's what makes Ms Chan's open offer of walking a Pattern worthwhile, it looks to be my best chance of finding my mother."

Edward "So your mother was from the Courts but didn't like the Logrus, that's different. Our host talks so positively about the Pattern, even with all her cautions about its difficulty."

"In my case, my Mother is dead..." Edward continues, "I have a description of my Father however, so I am curious to look at any pictures our host has, and see if any of them match the description I was given. What happened to your Mother?"

Cathal frowns in concentration, "I don't know exactly, it was late autumn. I was 10. She was attacked, house militia sent by her parents. She barely managed to defeat them and was badly wounded in the process. My father witnessed the attack, but denied the reality of what he saw until the night I almost died in the war. We were much closer after that. She then concealed my presence somehow so they wouldn't find me, left me a whole chunk of memories and instructions, lessons sort of, about how to use my abilities, and then left so that they'd follow her. I didn't know any of this until I was recovering in hospital after the demon attack, when she started speaking to me. I thought I was dreaming or hallucinating or just plain going mad at the time, but over the months that followed things started to sort themselves out, and I find I can now use some of those lessons she left to analyze the memories. I've had a lot of time over the last few years to work stuff out."

Akio murmurs to the room, "I think, Pattern or Logrus, where the mind goes, the body and spirit will always follow. If the spirit is at home with one or the other, the body and mind will follow. All must feel comfortable with one or the other, and seek to be a master of it."

Fatima responds, "So we need to focus our mind so our body and soul can persevere? Would that work while being physically drained? How do we train that?" Her eyes widen slightly while she asks.

"You do it or you die." Cormac says softly. "I had something kind of similar happen. There was just a soft spot where I knew I had to do something or I would die. I just did. I imagine it's similar in principle. You either do it or you die. You just have to have the mental discipline. Probably why Ms. Chan mentioned memorizing the details of the room." He points his head to his skull "Best to train the mind to do what needs to be done."

I get up from my seat and go over to Alana's side and quietly, "I have an idea on how we may survive our ordeal. If it's going to be as bad as Cordelia infers. I wonder what sort of medical facilities are available here. I'm thinking that I'd like to be hooked up to an IV and feeding tube. A catheter too... Have someone else take care of my bodily functions so that I can dedicate 100 percent of my mind to dealing with the fireworks when they go off. Maybe you'd like to have your physical welfare taken care of too... Then we won't be totally wasted away when it comes to the challenge of facing the Pattern. "

Alarna "I'm not sure I like that idea either. Maybe it won't be as bad if she's not opening a portal right or standing right next to us. As to the Pattern, I've done 36 hours straight with the mountain rescue teams in the driving snow in winter looking for climbers and walkers caught by the changing weather. It can't be that bad can it?"

I say to Alarna, "Well, in my experience, the Women are usually tougher than the guys. I'm going to check if it's an option and if things get rough I'll be able to call for help."

To the rest of the room I say, "Akio may have a point. Maybe this whole thing is just mind over matter. I hate to be a party pooper but I think I have a date with Zou Yan to get my cerebellum polished… In for a penny, in for a pound." I gather up my things and head towards the door…

Somewhat quietly Fatima says, "Memorizing the room. Sure. Focusing. Okay, okay." She takes a big breath and slowly exhales. She rises from her chair and watches as I back out the door. She looks briefly at the others in turn. "Okay," she says. "Back to the room, then to dinner. We'll see what we see. We've entered the Hammam. It won't be the same coming out, that seems a certainty." She follows me out of the room, glancing back she says, "Until then."

Fatima and I silently parted ways at the stairs. It’s just five ayem and there’s three hours to kill before breakfast. There’s no point in sleeping ‘til then. Any further conversation with my new found cousins will just add to my confusion, so I’m better off trying to digest everything I’ve just heard on my own. Plus, I’ve got to brace myself for when Ms. Chan’s ‘Trump Block’ comes down. So I head to my room.